


Just For Tonight

by tydeprince



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Christmas Eve, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-25
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-03 11:18:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2849003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tydeprince/pseuds/tydeprince
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki and Hide spend Christmas Eve cuddling.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just For Tonight

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [FEnM](http://fenm-universe.tumblr.com/) for the [TKG Secret Santa](http://tkgsecretsanta.tumblr.com/). Merry Christmas!

“ _Phew!_ I can’t believe I’ve gotten so bad at skating, I was totally all prepared to impress you tonight with my skills too.”

“Well we haven’t skated since we were kids, I suppose it can’t really be helped.” Kaneki shrugged and gave a small smile as he locked the door to his apartment. It had been Hide’s idea to go out ice skating together on Christmas Eve, a change of pace as the blond put it, and Kaneki had been more than happy to agree. For the past two weeks he had actually been dreading the fast approaching holiday, thinking for sure Hide was going to suggest the two get a hamburger for dinner to start out their evening, but he had been happily surprised when instead it was suggested they do something a bit more active.

The two had set out at about 8PM and, after more than a few bumped heads and scraped knees, the couple returned to Kaneki’s apartment cold and bruised, but otherwise completely content. The evening so far had been…nice. Not so far off from the cheerful days they had spent as kids, in a more carefree time. And for Kaneki, just spending that kind of personal time together was more than he could ever wish for. These days they hardly had the time for that, or perhaps it would be more correct to say Kaneki hardly had the time.

The past few months had taught the brunet that it was far from easy to keep his ghoulish secret away from the sharp intuition of his boyfriend. And -– he still couldn’t get over that, _boyfriend_ \-- hardly anything got past Hide. On more than one occasion Kaneki could almost swear he had already been found out.

And sometimes he thought he should let himself be. To just-

“Kaneki?”

Hide’s voice rang out, breaking the silence in the apartment, and Kaneki had to blink a few times in an awkward pause before realizing he had been standing in the entry way, unmoving.

“You coming inside?”

“Y-yeah, in a minute.” The brunet raised his head to smile at the blond before nodding and waving the other off, indicating he only needed a moment to take his shoes and jacket off. It wouldn’t do him any good to keep spacing out like that, especially when he had decided he was definitely going to make tonight special. It was Christmas Eve after all, and not even all of the anxiety in the world could keep him from enjoying tonight’s date. And yet…

_If only I could tell him…_

He relished the time he had to spend with Hide, he cherished every minute of it, but there was some part of him that felt great reluctance as well. After all, was he not now a danger? And if Hide were to ever find out his secret, and then reject him…Kaneki could scarcely bring himself to finish the thought.

Instead, he pushed his worrisome thoughts aside and shuffled over to the couch in the living room where Hide was waiting, a vibrant smile plastered across his face per usual. Kaneki could feel the butterflies in his stomach start to flutter about. Not the ones that precluded dark thoughts and long sleepless nights, but rather ones that incited a warm feeling to spread out to the very tips of his fingers and toes. And once again he felt reassured, like maybe things in his life would work out for once. Like maybe, and this time truly, his worries were perhaps unfounded. How nice it would be to be able to always feel that.

Taking a seat on the couch, Kaneki leaned contentedly against Hide and closed his eyes as he felt a hand come to rest on his head. The familiar touch was comforting and elicited a soft hum from the brunet. It was so warm and pleasant he almost could have drifted right off to sleep, but reason got the better of him and he lazily opened his eyes, willing himself to stay awake.

“Hide?”

The blond shifted a little as he idly combed his fingers through Kaneki’s hair. “Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Just…thank you.”

Hide opened his mouth as if to say something else, but if he had something on his mind, those thoughts were put away, and instead he let out an amused chuckle. “You’re really a dork, Kaneki.”

“So are you."

“…I guess you got me there. But I’m a lucky dork to have you here with me.”

“…”

Lucky…if anyone should have been saying that, it should have been Kaneki. Hide was his everything, and he had been saved countless times by the ball of sunshine he was lucky enough to call his friend…and now his boyfriend. Everything that had been done for him…he only wished he could somehow make up for all of it. But the situation now was so complicated…and he was forced to hide so much. Hide made him feel safe, made the hurt go away, but even then only so much could be done. And yet somehow…Hide could surpass even that obstacle.

Perhaps picking up on the negative emotions surrounding his friend, Hide shifted his position slightly so he could bring the both of them closer together, Kaneki’s head now laying gently against Hide’s chest. The soft thrum of the blond’s heartbeat could now be faintly heard and Kaneki found it strangely soothing, his expression mellowing out and his own heartbeat slowing down to match the other’s. Even with all of his troubles, he admittedly found it difficult when faced with such a familiar routine, one that had been often employed in similar situations in the past. Relaxing like that was something they had often done as kids when one of them had a particularly bad day…something Kaneki was quite used to. It was their own private thing.

Hide, by nature, normally appeared so boisterous and energetic that few could probably guess at the gentleness that lay underneath the exterior. But it was a gentleness Kaneki had become so accustomed to, it startled him to learn that not everyone had the privilege of experiencing it. It made him feel truly…loved. Like he was special somehow. Like he mattered.

“Relax, okay Kaneki? At least for tonight…you can put your worries behind you. I’m not going anywhere.” Hide’s voice had dipped down to a quiet murmur and his free arm had moved to lightly wrap itself around Kaneki in a protective embrace. Kaneki in turn tucked his knees up in front of him and clutched the fabric of Hide’s shirt, settling into a more comfortable position.

That’s right…he was safe. And even if he had yet to get over the traumas that had befallen him and worried greatly about what the future was going to bring him, for now at least, he could afford to spend one small evening in true comfort. Perhaps he could allow himself that much.

In the minutes of relative silence that followed, Kaneki smiled softly to himself as he listened to the quiet thumps of Hide’s heartbeat and the sound of his breathing. He focused on every little movement and sound, realizing they were things he hadn’t been able to appreciate in quite some time, and sighed contentedly into Hide’s chest. This was something that was real, something that grounded him and kept him at peace. And it was something he knew he never wanted to let go.

When Hide’s breathing eventually slowed down to long drawn out breaths, Kaneki didn’t even have to look up to know the blond had fallen asleep. Kaneki’s hand found Hide’s and squeezed it as he nuzzled his cheek against the fabric of the other’s shirt, inhaling the familiar scent that reminded him so much of home. A hint of wild flowers and old second hand books.

“Merry Christmas, Hide. I love you.”

Finally allowing his eyes to slide shut, Kaneki felt a gentle squeeze back to his own hand before drifting off into unconsciousness and slipping into a world of peaceful dreams.

“I love you too, Kaneki.”


End file.
